idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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