Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
