plz talk dirty to me
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
