Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
