Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
