she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
