I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
