somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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