im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
