Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
