He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
