Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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