just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
