I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
