Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
