At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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