Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
