Swine flu. Run for my life!
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
you are never too drunk for berry picking
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
