You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
