Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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