We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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