I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize