im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Randomize
