fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Did we literally take a cab across the street
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
