i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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