You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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