he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
