Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
