the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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