Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Randomize
