She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
