I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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