i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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