I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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