I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
time to smoke my breakfast
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
