did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
