You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
