I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
