..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
