i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It's blow job season.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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