Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
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