So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
