those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
there is puke in my bra ... again
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
