You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize