I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize