what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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