only if we run a train.
done.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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