Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
