so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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