It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I can't put those talents on a resume
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
