I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
