I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
