he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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