She's JV to your varsity
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
