Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
there's paper in my vomit.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
