He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Is it because I queefed?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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